Is there something dangerous about being thin?

If you’ve spent some time, perhaps years of your life, wanting that other thin body….

….or years of your life wanting this heavy body to go away….

….have you ever considered you might not want the thin body?

Have you ever thought you actually might like, in some inner corner of your being, the body you already have?

What’s so great about thinness? Are you sure it’s all that great? Have you ever heard of “bad” things happening to thin people, or around thin people?

Have you ever believed those thin people are in danger, or need to be extra careful (like not only with their diets, but with relationships of certain kinds, or something else)? Have you ever thought those with the perfect thin body are missing something, or left out?

Have you ever believed heavy people are happier for some specific reasons? Or safer? Or more comfortable in certain ways?

It can be really interesting to discover what you really think that underlies your thoughts and beliefs about body shapes that scare you, alarm you, worry you, disturb you in any way whatsoever.

Who would we be without these interesting stories?

“Without awareness of our unconscious practices, we have little chance of freeing ourselves from the suffering they cause. So, practicing being aware of where attention habitually goes and the suffering it causes and practicing finding the willingness to direct attention to the experience of life we want to be having are powerfully helpfulas we work out our own salvation diligently.” ~ Cheri Huber 

Much love,

Grace

2 Replies to “Is there something dangerous about being thin?”

  1. Hi Grace — this is a great topic; thanks for posting on thoughts around being thin and what it might show up as in our beliefs.

    I had interesting revelations about the dangers of being thin that showed up while I was doing EFT (tapping) on body image. I realized that being thin was a problem for me for two key reasons:

    1. Growing up between between two sisters who were heavy, I saw the criticism they endured about their weight from my older brothers and father. Being skinny was held up as a badge of honor — but that meant I was not like my sisters, I didn’t “belong” with them so I always felt like the oddball, left out and resented by my sisters for being thin.
    2. When I got pregnant in my mid-40s for the first time, I began adding weight. Before getting pregnant, I was at a healthy weight and never dieted. When I began adding weight with the pregnancy, I was delighted. It felt fun to expand my body and to wear “big” clothes and in some deeper sense, feel like I finally belonged to my family system. But after giving birth, I felt terrible with all the extra weight and have tried for years to lose it. I now realize that there was something much deeper than joining my family system with the weight — it was that when I was pregnant, I had a baby inside who I loved and who would love me. I’d belong to her and she would belong to me.

    Being big with pregnancy equaled a promise of love and belonging. The experience of that bonding was so profound; it would be the first time in my life I felt I belonged to family.

    My subconscious has since been telling me that if I lost weight I’d lose that pregnancy promise — even though that beautiful baby is now in high school! I was stunned to see this — and it felt very true for me. By questioning it with The Work, however, I see it is not true at all.

    Being “overweight” has been comforting at such a deep level whereas consciously it has created so much pain for me.

    Since these revelations occurred I’ve been discovering how to love myself deeply, unconditionally — including my body — which helps free me of the need to hold onto weight as proof I’m “pregnant with love” and acceptable as a family member. And if I do hold onto the weight, that’s ok too — I love my body more, not less, as it endures all these unconscious and conscious beliefs.

    I love your work, Grace, btw…you are such a beautiful soul offering so much wisdom, clarity, and guidance to us. Blessings on you and your work & The Work! 🙂

    1. So beautiful and helpful that you share the insights that you’ve learned from this inquiry. Thank you so, so very much. How fascinating what you’ve found about pregnancy specifically, and also your body shape in comparison to your siblings. Inspiring to read.–Much love, Grace

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